Greetings, obscurantists! This week the Obscure News gives you the low down on better living through chemistry. Get high on the cornucopia of obscure facts laced throughout our latest edition. If you are not already hip or hip enough, then get hip and hipper! Find out: * how to make recreational drugs * how to sell recreational drugs * how to contact the recreational drug association (RDA) * how to get shorty * how to drink or smoke until the money's gone * how to ruin a marriage and blame it on your kids (hint: get yourself a bong) * how to call attention to yourself (tip: take LSD as part of a clinical trial at Timothy Leary's Harvard, go home early, stop at a diner, enjoy your meal and lick the plate clean when you're done * how to avert, well-okay, how to take the edge off a mid-life crisis (may involve THC, nicotine, alcohol, and caffeine) * how to write a term paper backwards * how to spot a plain clothes cop on the street (hint: it's all in the dental plan) Then, find out why Yolanda's not getting high. read less